kumashe ayangeaor © I am Benue 2022

Pregnancy Out Of Wedlock; My Story

Inspirational, Stories 12/06/2022 by Kumashe Ayangeaor

This true-life story of Kumashe Ayangeaor, a single mom to a beautiful daughter of eight years old, will inspire you.

As humans, we sometimes make mistakes that may make things complicated for us. When faced with such a situation, please do not give up on yourself easily, keep pushing and holding on, and make good use of second chances. Sometimes our mistakes may cost us the love, help and support of family but don’t let that deter you. Don’t give up in the face of it all.

I got pregnant out of wedlock when I was in my 200 level in the university. My boyfriend denied being responsible for it then, after some days, he visited me and apologized for denying the pregnancy in the first place and for encouraging me to go have an abortion but he kept me at an arm’s length for some reasons best known to him. I got scared and ran out of my father’s house. I literally packed my bags. I was just too scared to tell my father or even let anyone at home know. I was not sure of daddy’s reaction and I was ashamed of myself too. Before parking and leaving my father’s house I had already spoken to a good friend and course-mate, Prudence-Hannah Ucheh, about accommodation. She was so kind and understanding and said that I may move into her apartment. I stayed with her and continued receiving my lectures from school. There was a day I fell very ill, Prudence kept praying for me, and she took me to the federal medical centre Apir for check-up and treatment, and she used her pocket money to settle the bills.

I and my team counsel and support young single moms between the age bracket of 12 and 28, who are passing through traumatic motherhood or untold hardships.

My family looked for me but I refused to show up. A few months later, my tummy got bigger and Prudence thought it would be wise for me to disclose the news to my family so I took her advice. I thought of my father’s younger sister, my aunt Deaconess Janet  Daagba. She is someone who knows the right words to use in any given situation no matter how ugly it may appear. I went and told her about it. She did something remarkable for me; She said I and my husband will pray about it and go talk to your father on your behalf. The news was disclosed to my family and no one clapped for me because pregnancy out of wedlock is not clapped for in my society.

To cut the long story short, I gave birth to a beautiful girl on a Friday and went to school for an exam on Saturday, I kept going to school with my baby till I graduated in 2015. I left my baby with my maternal grandparents in the village and went for my NYSC(National Youth Service Corps) in 2017.

Today,  I run a Foundation known as Blessing Kumashe Foundation where I and my team counsel and support young single moms between the ages of 12- 28, who are passing through traumatic motherhood or untold hardships. I also run a mobile Massage Therapy business known as Relax & Heal Massage. I am a radio presenter/scriptwriter at Benue Radio London as well. My child (daughter) is now 8 years old, and we are doing great today despite the challenges.

Now, this is the definition of a strong woman. It is true when it is said that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Whatever you are going through, make sure you do not give up in the face of it all, keep pushing, holding on and in the end, you will smile.

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